The Ballad of Mass Effect
by Stuart James
Summary: Not sure where this poetry bug came from, but I've been doing it a bit recently. Thought this would be good for a laugh anyway.
1. Chapter 1

Tentative journeys are where it began,  
Finally free of the solar system, were man.  
Prothean secrets, found under Mars' surface,  
It unified Earth, gave everyone purpose.

Within the secrets that were found,  
Discoveries, which were sound,  
Detailing the galaxy, and all its stars,  
So that they might themselves now travel that far.

Charon, a mass relay, was found around Pluto,  
A device which allowed space craft to go,  
Just about anywhere you like in space,  
Merely point your ship, and go any place!

But out there in space, the galaxy has already started,  
Turians, an alien species, quickly regarded,  
The wanton activation by man of a relay long dimmed,  
As an act of war, their territories now skimmed.

By 'The First Contact War' it became known,  
The less dramatic 'Relay-314 Incident' in turian tomes,  
A short but bloody initial encounter,  
But the humans fought hard and did not flounder.

Resolution was sought by the Citadel Council,  
A galactic body with which meaningful exchange was possible.  
And peace did follow, as did the inevitable backlash,  
As the brutality of the conflict at times, some could not let pass.

So into the abyss, Earth did throw itself,  
Each new species they found as fascinating as an elf.  
And in new territories they did begin to dwell,  
But some soon found out, they may have just found hell.

A young girl, last name Shepard, no more than sixteen,  
Lived a peaceful life on Mindoir, for her parents an idyllic dream,  
'til the day that they came, batarian slavers, another new race,  
Who slaughtered her mother and father, then kidnapped her from this place.

The newly formed space fleet of the Earth Systems Alliance,  
Did their best to defeat this newly formed defiance,  
Shepard was saved, though not all were so lucky,  
It was mentioned, however, she remained bright and plucky.

Under the Alliance's wing Shepard did find herself,  
It suggested that she take her biotic potential off the shelf,  
And to help with the colonies, like hers, to assist others,  
She jumped at the chance to help her colonial sisters and brothers.

The military life suited her well,  
She would go far, it was easy for all to tell.  
Biotic output, off the charts,  
Always consistent, never fits and starts.

Marksmanship, hacking, systems, comms,  
The list of her outstanding skills went on.  
Up the ranks Shepard flew, until finally her own command,  
Of which she would have been proud, were it not for Akuze's harsh sands.

On that planet's surface, her squad were pinned,  
While a massive Thresher Maw creature did smash and spin.  
Her entire squad killed, or at least so she thought,  
She honoured that to the last man they so valiantly fought.

Difficult circumstances bring out the greatest in some,  
This was recognised in Shepard and it was not long,  
Before the Alliance knew that she would not rest,  
'til she reached N7 status, the best of the best.

So it came to pass that the status was given,  
And a position offered, something about which she could be driven,  
A prototype stealth craft, the Normandy, XO her position,  
The maiden voyage under Captain Anderson; just another routine mission.


	2. Chapter 2

The mission takes them to the planet of Eden Prime,  
Colonised by humans and deemed divine,  
Further Prothean secrets have been discovered,  
Their task: to ensure it is safely recovered.

On this maiden voyage was a further crewman,  
A representative of the Council, Nihlus, turian.  
His rank Spectre, investigator for his superiors,  
Shepard noted his idle comments were spurious.

The tension between humans and turians was not truly gone,  
Some of the crew had already voiced suspicions about this one,  
But Nihlus' reasons for being aboard were greater,  
To assess Commander Shepard, so she might too become Spectre.

Jenkins and Alenko formed her ground squad,  
They landed on the planet, then trod,  
Their way to the space port, and the Prothean beacon,  
But her squad is ambushed, young Jenkins' life taken.

Ashley Williams, the young marine's name,  
Who witnessed the whole of her squad slain,  
Shepard then found, amidst the sound of gunfire,  
From geth, synthetic life, who had created this mire.

They then did proceed, to get closer to the truth,  
When a sight they beheld caused all to be spooked.  
A craft, at least so they thought, two kilometres high,  
Shape quite organic, as it ascended into the sky.

The Spectre Nihlus, who had scouted ahead,  
Was found at the tram station, now dead,  
A worker saw the whole thing, and heard the name,  
Of Nihlus' murderer, Saren, Spectre status the same.

Through further geth the squad did fight,  
Now with Ashley Williams joining their plight,  
'til they found the beacon, humming and active,  
It made Shepard's brain feel like it had had a laxative.

Images burned hotly into her mind,  
Horrific and disturbing, acts so unkind,  
A people's planets burning, a feeling of yearning,  
The images turning, then it just violently stops.

To the Citadel Council the information on Saren they must take,  
Captain Anderson informs Shepard once she awakes.  
Ashley Williams he also tells her, is now part of the crew,  
Which pleases Shepard, she's seen what Ash can do.

But the Council seem more interested in self-protection,  
Than investigating Saren, a question on their selection,  
Without concrete evidence, they will not budge,  
Human ambassador, Udina, claims it is an anti-human grudge.

Never one to question providence, Shepard's luck changes,  
It appears that one here has tried exchanges,  
Information on Saren, something she might need,  
And the quarian, Tali Zorah, had this data indeed.

Proof, irrefutable, of Saren's crimes, most heinous,  
To chase him, unfettered, Shepard would need a new status,  
Despite the objections of the turian councillor,  
Spectre status was bestowed, and of the great responsibility they did tell her.

The Normandy now hers, Captain Anderson stands down,  
She had great respect for him, and receives this news with a frown.  
But her orders are clear, to track down this Spectre phoney,  
By first reaching his trusted captain's daughter, Doctor Liara T'Soni.


End file.
